My friend @KenHerron paid me a backhanded compliment about my writing yesterday. In an exchange about the timing of my publishing he wrote:
“I hope it’s not wrong to eat lunch while reading smut, as your posts always seem to pop up right about lunchtime!”.
And I thought about that because the latest blog posts aren’t erotic at all – at least I don’t view them as such. And responded,
“no smut. Ha. Think of them as dessert. Love you”
To which he replied:
“Oh please. You could write a shopping list, and it would be “smut”! :)”
So as I made an emergency batch of double chocolate and walnut brownies (sans measuring cups, measuring spoons and no absolute knowledge of just how hot the oven actually is here in the apartment I am renting in Croatia) this morning I thought about attempting to make a grocery list erotic as a writing exercise. This is also for my girlfriend Deborah who affectionately refers to me as a “sexy cupcake”. So here goes (an over-the-top-list to support the most sublime evening of love-making imaginable, select site, add lover, some preparation required).
100 tea-lights, white soy and unscented, in glass votives
4 dozen, fresh Loch Fyne oysters and antique Majolica oyster plates
1 dozen certified organic, free range, eggs (preferably brown, blue and green shelled)
1 liter of Marsala wine, from Sicily, bearing Denominazione di Origine Controllata designation
1 kilo each of fresh, organic, strawberries, raspberries, blackberries and currants
Maybe it isn’t the grocery list itself as the possibilities such a list presents…
How did I do Ken? 😉
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